Sunday's early start.......

We had made arrangement to travel to see some of Cag's family toady in Devon. It meant a 6.45am start for me, which with luck means we can leave by mid-day. I made it with minutes to spare.



A hundred and forty four mile round trip for two hours of good company (and chocolate cake). Cags eldest sister, her husband and a younger sister, recently widowed. Well worth the journey. It gave me a chance to talk over our problems, thoughts, and possibilities, with sensible people who know and care about our situation.



It's not always easy for Cag to keep up as M.S has slowed down her reasoning but she enjoys the company and the extra attention her sisters pay her. They are the same people who help me so much in my mother's house clearance recently, so I have a lot to thank them for. They've promissed to be there if I need them, although what they can do will be limited by distance.

We took the dog, he was on his best behavior, and for once, looking his best. I'd spent about three hours over the last few evenings clipping and grooming his coat. He's dropped lower on the pecking order over the last few months, so has not had the attention he deserves. But he doesn't complain.

Now for some reading............ you know who.

Saturday.......Alien alert!

I have to get an early night to night. I have a 6.45am start tomorrow, so here's one I prepared earlier.

Saturday and another beautiful day. More trails across the sky, with a few of those white fluffy things thrown in for interest, and this evening, wood smoke on the air. Love this time of the year.

I was 'flashed' this morning. Not intentionally, but it made for an interesting start to the day. I deliver a paper to my cousin on Saturday. She is recovering from a stroke and was being attended by nurses when I arrived. I was talking to her husband and glanced out of the window at a holiday caravan, about 20 yards away, sited opposite his home, when a naked young lady walked passed the glass door of this caravan.

I mentioned it to him so he turned to look, but by then there was no one there. Just as he turned back to me, she walked passed again. I didn't bother to say anything this time, there didn't seem any point. Just a beautiful start to a beautiful day.

I took a trip into town this afternoon, something I try never to do on a Saturday. The people amazed me. All I could think about was, did Matron know so many patients were out? It was either that or an Alien Ship had landed close by, and the occupants were trying to merge with Saturday shoppers. Identical twins were walking towards me, dressed in trainers, baggy jeans and 'Il Divo' sweatshirts. Unfortunately one was ugly, and so was her sister. If only Carlos, David, Sab and Urs could see them now. Fans? I hope not!

The Saturday paraders were there, breezing from one end of the town to the other. Big Issue sellers, canvassers, and a drummer asking for change. Trying not look out of place, I started talking loudly into my cupped hand, hoping people wouldn't realise that I didn't have a mobile phone. I was glad to make it back to the safety of the car without being 'taken over' by aliens or being spotted as an outsider.

And so to bed, but a little reading first. I'm up to March 2007 and no tissues need yet, but I recon I should have them handy Lady Stalker.

Friday.......... 4.50am.

The light comes on. Cag nudges but I'm already awake. My mother is looking around the door.

"It's the vet man. A lady came into the room and told me the vet man was here."

Vet man, vat man, what man? What's going on? My mother was insisting that a lady had come into her room and said that the vet had come to see us.

She made me check around the house to see if I could find the lady, but of course there was no one. It was a case of dreams becoming reality. I got her back into bed and settled her down. She still believed there was a lady, and she had spoken to her.

"You must think I'm daft", she said to me. I put up no argument. "But it was so real".

It was just a dream I told her. Now if she could dream about winning the lottery tomorrow, and that became reality..............

It was another beautiful day. Blue sky and more trails, warm in the sun, but with that hint of Autumn on the breeze. This is a great time of the year.

Thursday..........

I awoke early, still dark, not feeling too good. Nothing specific, just a general feeling of unwellness. A dull ache under the ribs, the area that has to be scanned. The feeling stayed with me most of the day, which was a shame, as it was such a beautiful day. Blue sky and vapour trails.

A lady from Social Care returned my call today and I told her the problem we could be facing, when I have my operation(s). As soon as I have the dates, they will call and set up some sort of care package, so it's 'wait and see' again. There won't be a lot of help from the family I'm afraid. They all live too far away.............. and the very thought of body fluids, throws them into a panic.

What a mailbox tonight. Five messages from one young lady, and 'thank you'. I shall read as you suggested, tissues at the ready.

Speaking of tissues, I bought a new brand today. They must be Trade Union Tissues. One out, all out............... no perforations! Don't you just hate it when that happens?

Wednesday and the news......

The news. Not so good. Doctors on Friday, letter asking me to make an appointment at the clinic of my choice today. Choice of four, so I went for the one the Doc suggested............ the nearest, about eight miles down the road. Now I have to wait. Nothing about the gallbladder scan, but it's a bit too soon for that.

We had two Community Nurses today. One to change my mother's dressings, whilst the other, an old friend, saw to Cag's catheter. I asked about my situation. At least five, perhaps six weeks for recovery from each............. and definitely NO lifting.

My day revolves around lifting. I judge the day by the number of lifts, so it looks like I'm going to need help.

It's early days but I contacted Social Services, a case coordinator I know, to see what the situation is regarding my two charges. She wasn't there but will get back to me. The sooner I know the options, the better I will feel........ and it will put the minds of those around me at rest.

Tuuuuesday

So, the truth is out. An altered ego, or perhaps nearer to the truth. Members of my family sometimes drop in at my other blog. I'm not sure I want them knowing too many details of my life, or what happens to me and my charges.

5.46am. Cramp! I had to get out of bed. Thought a walk would be the best thing to clear the problem. I heard movement....... my mother was up......... and dressed! Sh*t.

It was easier to get her back into bed than I expected, and then she slept through until about 9 o'clock. Just wish she would look at the clock before she got up, rather than after, when she was dressed.

The weather was better than promised, so I managed to get my mother out in the car for an hour. Only to the shops, but it was a change of scene, and added to things to talk about. She really needs the outings, even though the pain getting to the car and back can over shadow the 'trip out'.

Monday, Monday.......

Monday, Monday.............. Mamas and Papas........... Seems like a lifetime away.......... And no ones getting fat 'sept Mama Cass. No salt on my tail....... either.

Hi S.D, so good to have you visit. Too many questions and too many comments to answer all at once. I felt you were, or had gone through similar thoughts as myself. It's easy to see from you writing that you are looking for something that you haven't quite found as yet............. but you will, I know you will. Felt I needed space, so hence Late at Night.

More 'me time' today. Cag's eating habits are becoming more manageable, and as I was cooking lamb steaks for my mother and I, something I knew Cag wouldn't eat, I took myself off to Supermarket to do some 'looking around' shopping, rather than shopping to a list. Slices of Aberdeen Angus beef from the deli caught my eye. I knew she would eat this, so that was dinner sorted for her.

Planning on sausages and mash tomorrow. So I bought the best there were. I'll serve them with sliced onion, that has been slowly cooked, melt in the mouth, perhaps a little hidden garlic. Some local cauli, the last of our peas, with a little gravy. Comfort food.......Mmmmmmm.

Bought another two pans today. Another 10 inch frypan and a stirfry pan that can double as a wok. Plenty big enough for anything I have planned. Now I must stop. I have all I need, probably far more than I shall ever need, but that's the nature of the beast.

At least my mind hasn't spent a lot of time pondering the future today. Dealing with the here and now is enough.